Life Without Alcohol: Why It Feels So Hard to Imagine
- Michelle Gagnon
- Oct 1
- 5 min read
Updated: Oct 4
Drinks, Drinks, Everywhere
Drinks with breakfast. Drinks with brunch. Drinks with lunch, dinner, and late-night snacks. Drinks with birthdays, weddings, and anniversaries. Drinks with graduations, retirements, and promotions. Drinks with first dates, girls’ nights, and reunions. Drinks with painting, yoga, book clubs, and road races. Drinks with golf, fishing, camping, cooking, baking, and crafting. Drinks with music festivals, concerts, opera nights, and sporting events. Drinks with beach days, road trips, flights, and cruises. Drinks with poolside lounging, campfires, fireworks, rainstorms, and sunsets. Drinks with deep conversations, trade secrets, reflection, contemplation, and moments of unwinding. Drinks with summer escapes, winter holidays, spring markets, and harvest festivals. Drinks with new apartments, old houses, new beginnings, and farewells. Drinks with celebration. Drinks with pause. Drinks with everything in between, naturally woven into the fabric of our lives.
Why Living Sober Feels So Strange
As I type out this long list, mentally checking off each item, it’s not surprising that imagining a life without drinking can feel difficult, even nearly impossible. The thought of doing all or most of these things sober can feel so unnatural, uncomfortable, or even strange. I’m not here to tell you it won’t feel that way; it did for me. Alcohol has become so woven into our culture that it’s easy to forget life without it is even possible. From celebrations to quiet nights at home, drinking often feels like the default. But what if it didn’t have to be? What if stepping back from alcohol could bring you more joy, deeper connections, and so much more fun than you imagined?
Born Curious and Creative
We are born into this world sober. From babies to toddlers and into adolescence, our minds are alive with curiosity, creativity, and a natural desire for fun. We explore the world, figuring out very early what we enjoy and what we don’t, guided by our instincts, experiences, and desires. It isn’t until others teach us differently, through rules, norms, or social expectations, that we begin to adjust or question our own natural desires.
Teenage Years and the First Drink
I look back to when I was fifteen and how my peers were drinking and smoking and although it wasn’t something we were “supposed to” be doing at that age, it was just a known thing that everyone did. Making up stories about where you were, sneaking around, getting drunk and high, it was all just part of being a teenager back then.
I specifically remember the first time I took a drink. I was fourteen; it was peach schnapps, and although I thought it tasted like gasoline (because it kind of is), I sat with my friend in her room, giggling as we secretly sipped it, and pretended to like it. My immediate thought was that it was awful, but my desire to fit in was my top priority, and this girl needed all the help she could get. Think back to your first drink, and most likely you can relate. It wasn’t a natural thing for me to drink; it was something I forced myself to like and eventually did.
Experimenting in My Twenties
Fast forward to my twenties, and I remember experimenting to find a drink I actually liked. I didn’t like beer or hard alcohol, and they weren’t serving Purple Passion at the bars. I found Zima and eventually Coors Lite were okay, which helped me find my way to tolerating alcohol and eventually binge drinking.
As I look back, it seems so clear to me that I didn’t enjoy drinking. But it was socially normal, and I wanted to fit in, so I molded myself to be like everyone else. And I did it without even realizing I was doing it. It felt fun and rebellious and gave me a false sense of confidence and connection that felt so real. It was the focal point of my social life, and I didn’t know any other way.
The Illusion of Alcohol in Adulthood
Even as we grow into adulthood, drinking is presented to us as fun, harmless, and even sometimes beneficial. Advertisements show sparkling glasses raised in laughter, friends smiling at rooftop parties, and athletes enjoying a post-race beer as if it were part of the reward for hard work. Social media and movies reinforce the idea that alcohol is a key to connection, relaxation, and celebration. It becomes woven into our understanding of enjoyment and success, making it feel not only normal but necessary for a good time.
The Reality About Alcohol
The reality, however, is very different. Alcohol is a toxin, a type 1 carcinogen, and scientifically proven to affect nearly every organ in the body, disrupt hormones, and alter brain function. Even small amounts carry risk. In 2022, more than 378,000 alcohol-associated cancers occurred among women in the United States alone.
But cancer is just one part of the picture. Alcohol can increase anxiety and depression, disrupt hormonal balance, raise stress levels, and negatively affect gut health, which in turn impacts digestion, immunity, and even mood. Choosing sobriety or cutting back gives your body a chance to heal, your mind clarity, and your energy a natural boost. Your liver, your heart, your immune system, your gut, and even your skin will thank you. Sobriety isn’t about missing out; it’s about reclaiming your health, your choices, and the ability to fully enjoy life without chemical interference.
Feeling All the Feels
Choosing to step away from alcohol isn’t about giving something up, it’s about making space for more. More fun in the moments you live, more connection in the relationships you have, and more confidence in the way you feel about yourself. At first, it may feel uncomfortable or even impossible, but once you begin to experience the benefits, you’ll realize your life opens up in ways you never expected. It’s a reminder that joy, fun, and connection are always within you, not in the glass you're holding.
An Invitation to Begin
If you’re curious about what life without drinking might feel like, I’ve created a free resource to help you start exploring: 7-Day Journal Prompts for Your Sober-Curious Journey
Try a 7-day sober experiment guided by daily prompts to help you reflect, get curious, and gently explore your habits, without judgment.
Let’s create a community around living fully, clearly, and with joy!
You can also connect with me here:
Facebook: @midlifemoxie
Instagram: @moxieinthemids
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